Should we really be saying Thank U, Next?
Look, we've all been there. You've split up with your boyfriend and you go around to collect your things and hey, one thing leads to another and you sleep together. Sometimes it can actually be beneficial, it's like one final goodbye before you really shut that door and throw away the key. But if that one last time turns into a regular thing...not so beneficial.
The only way having regular sex with an ex-works out as a good idea is when neither one of you have any feelings for the other and you’re both totally cool with using each other just to get your bit. Alas, the likelihood of that ever happening? Slim.
However, having sex with an ex does have its perks.
He's gone down on you when you've been in-between waxes, he's used to your morning breath and he knows for a fact what you really look like when you wake up in the morning.
He's bored (horny), you're bored (horny), makes sense right? You know you can call them up at 2 am when you can't sleep and they'll come right over. You're also guaranteed great sex because you've had enough practice together.
He knows what really gets you going. There's no fake moaning or politely trying to guide him through what works and what doesn't. He knows where to find your clit and knows exactly what to do with it.
It's > A One Night Stand
If you're the kind of person who is a little self-conscious about the number of people you've slept with, sleeping with your ex allows you to have casual sex without that total rising. Plus, there's no awkward morning after where you have to wait for them to wake up and leave.
While there are a number of pros to having sex with an ex, it really isn't a great idea...
You Still Have All Of The Feels
You broke up for a reason but more than likely, this sleeping together carry on is taking place recently after the pair of you split and no matter how much you want to tell yourself that you're over him, you're not and having sex with him is not helping.
You're Being Used
Remember how before you met him and you were on the dating scene and you would encounter f*ckboy after f*ckboy and you weren't interested? Well, this is the exact same situation. He's cool with having sex with you on a regular basis but he's not so cool with calling you his gf? Sure, you're getting sex too but we dare you to try and tell us that's all you want.
Being tired after sex is a given but how are your emotions feeling? You're lying to yourself everytime you say "it's only a bit of fun", it's not. Having sex without emotion is extremely difficult, especially when that person broke your heart. Telling yourself those playdates won't affect you is like telling yourself you won't put on any weight after eating 6 Big Macs in a row...
You're Putting Yourself Danger
When you were in a relationship, you practised safe sex and you knew he wasn't sleeping around (unless that's why you're now single) so the chances of contracting an STI was pretty darn slim. Now, you're both single and what he gets up to when he's not with you is not only a complete mystery but none of your business. Chances are he's sleeping around which increases your chances of catching something you definitely do not want.
You Won't Move On
This one is pretty obvious but it's true. How will you ever find your actual Prince Charming when you're spending all your time with your ex? You're supposed to be out there getting over your ex. You're not supposed to be hopping into bed with him at any given chance.
Your Life Is Going To Be Dramatic
In an ideal world, consenting, mature adults who were once in a relationship together can have sex together without things getting dramatic. But, the reality is - that's not the case. One of you will get attached all over again and ultimately get hurt. Also, your friends won't be too pleased with the news and if they're true friends, they'll speak their mind but you won't want to hear it and boom! fight.
You're Going To Have To Go Through A Breakup, All Over Again
Hearing your ex is seeing someone new is never an easy fact to swallow, especially when they're still sleeping with you. When you first broke up, it was completely justified for you to spend all week in your pyjamas eating ice cream but now, you've kinda only got yourself to blame.
The cons truly outweigh the pros when it comes to sleeping with an ex and while we're still tempted by that one final goodbye, we won't be going back for seconds.